Kind of a day-dreaming song. Written about a collection of memories, mostly from high school I suppose. Tried for a bit of a happier, more up-beat feeling than my usual stuff.

Feedback on the song, lyrics, or mixing/recording is welcome! I'm still a good bit away from the next CD-release, so lots of time to work on feedback I receive.

Lyrics
Grey fisted clouds in the sky. Plaid skirt and innocent eyes,
And I am no longer sane.
Small road, stop sign ahead. Slow intersection. Big hotel bed.
Oh, my mind seems to have drifted away.

If you call for me I'll know this is a dream,
And as stupid as it seems- I'll wake.

Bright blue sky all around. Cows on the highways and fire on the ground.
And I've come here but I don't know why.
Misguided grasp on the truth. Gold and silver but nothing for you.
I have better things in mind.

Don't reach for me. Things are never what they seem.
I'd kiss you if I could but it'd only be a dream.
And don't call my name from any other state,
As pointless as it seems- I'd wake.

Oh, my mind. My mind.

Broom handle twins in the sky.
Two pairs of mean little eyes.

If you hold onto me I'll know this is a dream.
Invite me in your room and I won't stay asleep.
If your behavior should change, I'll know that it's fake
And though I won't want to,
Though I'll fight to stay,
Though it's unfair- I'll wake.

nice mood, nice everything, this must be the easiest review ever for me :p
simply dont reach this level myself so i just wanted to say i love the song, and production too
doesnt sound happy to me though, no need for anyway
listened 3 times with pleasure but will it last longer i wonder?
maybe a break thingie would be nice? or a build up to something exciting
(excuse my english pls)
welcome anyway
Max

Thanks Max! 
I did say "happier" than my usual stuff, which is not to say that it's "happy" ...

I'll give your suggestions some thought. See if I can't extend the song a bit without it feeling tacked-on. Thanks again!

LOL

i guess its easier to just say it then to achieve such a thing,
it def has to get better from it and that might be difficult, but if it does , you win
hope it works

So how long do you intend trying to fit into the category 'indi music' ?

That was exceptionally good

Still is...I'm also on thirds ..
It's so well made, orchestrated to a formula, I can imagine it taking you very far.

Cheers for uploading

@kings - I'm not sure if you're being sarcastic or kind, but if it's kind, then thank you.

As for me trying to "fit into" indie... I'm not sure what you mean. I'm a 1-man band. All of my music is recorded in a bedroom studio in my apartment, mixed by me, and distributed on CDs that I burn myself (or on a website that I pay $10/month to host). I think I'm "indie" because I have no funding (and no fan-base, really. Look me up on YouTube and see how few views my music has.)

I suppose I'll remain "indie" as long as no one's really listening to me. lol

First of all, welcome to Bandamp! Second this is amazing! The production is crisp, the mix seems perfect - your vocals are truly fine, the lyric content is compelling. Nice punchy rhythm. The whole song sounds very professional in its presentation. I can find nothing that needs "fixing". I don't know why you're not on regular airplay. Anyway, I look forward to hearing more of your stuff!

Welcome to this lil community, Brian.
IŽm totally impressed by this debut. Congrats.
I just can repeat what "Catty", kings and others posted before.
This is a perfect composed, performed and produced song. I guess that youŽre still pretty young though your songwriting- producing skills sound very experienced, mature, adult (sorry for my denglish). 

Here on bandamp youŽll find a few more "livingroom-one-man-band-producers" . So, welcome to the "single club".  

U.L.I.

Thanks so much for the kinds words and the warm welcome, U.L.I. and "Catty" ( )

Cool song! Not much to critique from me, except the fact that I would REALLY like to hear an acoustic version of this!

Great work!

    --XFactor--

no comment but high vote


ehm... btw....

cool song, great production, wonderful composition, pretty voice

good quality man! and nice voice!!

Thanks all for the kind comments. Very encouraging to read.

An acoustic version, eh, XFactor? I'll keep that in mind. I don't often re-do originals as acoustic versions but sometimes it's fun. (If I could get someone else to do the drumming.)

I just noticed that my song says something about being in a battle, and a lot of the other ones I'm listening to... don't. I wonder what kind of battle I accidentally entered when I posted this first one... lol 

I usually won't like too pop-ish songs like this but

hahahaha it's so funny XD.

Ya and very good quality. How you you get those sounds? Do you use VSTs?