#1October 26th, 2007 · 02:00 AM
91 threads
73 posts
United States of America
You're Not Fooling...Anyone
go ahead take your chances
tell me something i don't know
about yourself, just come clean
because you're fake and it shows

just take of that mask you wear
you're not fooling anyone
stop looking at your hair, in the mirror
you're not fooling...anyone

walking down the hall
you think you have it all
maybe someday that will change
you get all the guys
just bat your eyes
hopefully that will change

just take off that mask you wear
you're not fooling anyone
stop looking at you hair, in the mirror
you're not fooling...anyone

you have your head held high
and your nose stuck up
you've been with every guy
got every girl calling you a backstabbing slut

ohhh
just take off that mask you wear
cause you're not fooling anyone
stop looking at your hair, in the mirrior
ohhh
you're not fooling...anyone
#2November 3rd, 2007 · 08:24 PM
30 threads
169 posts
United States of America
pretty good
I think this is good. I like a different title:

That Mask You Wear
or
Take Off That Mask You Wear
or
Take Off That Mask

...you get the point. That seems like the real hook line of the song. "You're Not Fooling...Anyone" is good too, but more generic. I like the image of a mask that you take off.

This is pretty well put together. Needs a band.
#3November 6th, 2007 · 05:45 PM
21 threads
235 posts
United Kingdom
I get the feeling this is based on some one you know.....  
#4November 7th, 2007 · 04:43 PM
2 threads
22 posts
United States of America
I like the intensity.  That line, "walking down the hall," seems to be a filler sentence and somewhat of a weak spot.  Overall, I like it.
#5November 13th, 2007 · 07:18 PM
115 threads / 18 songs
1,414 posts
United States of America
Just wondering...
Hey, Bee-- it's been a long time since I've been here in the Lyric forums   It's good to see that you've stuck with what you love!  I'll have to agree with SlightlyStoopid, about the "walking down the hall" line, but it's not terrible or anything.  It was an attempt to create some imagery, and for that, you should be commended!

I know some of us have asked this before, and so I hope you won't take this like I'm getting on your case (because that's not it at all), but do you have plans to record any of your music?  I was a lot like you are, before I began recording; I would write song after song, and it was tons of fun, but eventually I got a hunger to begin making it REAL... you know, in music!  All it took was some determination on my part, and a little bit of money that I saved up so that I could buy a microphone and a way to plug it into the computer.  Then, any time I had the house to myself, I could sing out and record what I had.  I sucked right at first (like in my old tracks that I've now deleted, called For What's it's Worth, I Hated the Rain and Acute Paranoia... even my old Actaully song that you've commented on .... it was bad, looking back on it and comparing it with my most recent songs that I've recorded, like the song that I'm working on right now, Lock Down, Move On.

Anyway what I was wondering is if you have a way to record stuff, even if it's just your voice singing your lyrics!  If you could find a way to do that, then I'm sure there would be some people on here happy to help make some music for you to put the words to!  Heck, I'm a busy person, but I might even be able to spare some time to make some stuff up.  It wouldn't be as rocked out as any of the bands that you've listed as your influences in your biography, but it would be a start, yeah?

Anyway, just curious   You could PM me or just reply to this thread if you wanna talk about it!

Later,
TLS
#6November 13th, 2007 · 10:05 PM
91 threads
73 posts
United States of America
BANDDDDAGE.
actually right now im in a band with some friends. im the singer and guitar player. we're still looking for a few more members.

yep, i've got a way to record.

PEACE.
#7November 14th, 2007 · 01:17 AM
115 threads / 18 songs
1,414 posts
United States of America
hey, good to hear   perhaps we'll hear some of it one day?

laterz.

#8November 19th, 2007 · 06:35 PM
91 threads
73 posts
United States of America
maybe you'll hear some of it some day.

(still think i suck!!!!)
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