Cricky such varied comments you must be totally confused.

I'm listening to it for the fith time:

The production sounds very good to me professional or not professional.

The Key: If you did change the key would you be happy with the music, for me if I change the key it becomes a differen't song, if it's the same with you, then keep your vocal as it is but either do it again and sing softer, you will then find it easier to hit the lower notes, also it will help if you are totally realaxed. It's not impossible to achieve, or do a collab on someone who has a lower range.

Hope your not even more confused?

Good luck

Denis

Yeah , I questioned the whole "Pro" thing.  I just feel if someone is gonna post a song with PRO in the title then that would denote that it is actually PROFESSIONAL and not just someones best attempt at a master.  Anyway, not trying to be harsh just think we should be upfront and clear about our music.

hmm, i like it alot ^-^ and i like ur voc

crap! i just posted like full review and it didnt post all if it!

awww

thanks for the comment anyway!

so, here's the deal-- i've got this bit of a system in place... when people review and rate my songs, i review and rate theirs   it works out really nicely!  Thanks for your review on [Actually 2].  it's much appreciated.  this is me returning the act of kindness!  The other songs on bandamp that i rate are more or less at random because i have no decent way of filtering through them ALL to rate them, so i only do the ones that catch my eye.

so, to start with, i like the melody on the "you'll wish" parts.  it made me think of All American Rejects.  this song itself wasn't really like their stuff, but that area of the vocals was neat.  i think you ought to pronounce the end of the word "page" a little stronger, because if i wasn't listening hard enough, i'd think you were just saying "pay."

i think that too many of the important instruments are all pushed into the right channel, while the guitar part is placed into the  .  the second verse (just before the first "you'll wish" section... at least i'm calling the second verse   i hope i'm right!) ... anyway.  the second verse's left channel is quieter and sounds nicer, to be honest.  i like the volume balancing during the "you'll wish" parts.  i think you've put a lot of time into the instruments' parts, and it shows, because this is definitely a much better production than if you had only a piano banging away over those chords!  i found that i wasn't really distracted by any of the intruments' parts themselves.  that being the case, i think the advice given in the previous posts are still valid--

-some real audio samples for that piano would really add to the fullness of the song's tone.

-i agree with the suggestion by SirBorris in post #8 about the reverb.

-i like what MaxdB in post #14 said about raising the melody a 5th, rather than a whole octave.  The octave thing wouldn't be too hard for the verses, but for the "you'll wish" sections, going up a whole octave would prove to be a rather formidable task   Hence, i like what MaxdB said about going up a 5th.

-all of this being said, i also agree with Denis's comments in post #16; in the end you've gotta decide if you want to guard the song as your own, the way you have it now, or if you wanna "please the crowd," so to speak.

okay, final statements:  i like the song as a whole.  you've got a lot of instruments adding to the experience here.  i like the bass.  save a little money and get a decent mic from radio shack, and the 1/4" to 3/8" adapter it'll prolly take for you to plug it into the line-in port on your computer.  along with some good software reverb effects, it'm sure it'll beat a usb mic

well, that's all for me.  i don't mean to write a novel.

later,
TLS

ps.  if you're looking for novels, check out Philosophy: The Ultimate Thread.

I also "questioned the whole "Pro" thing" !
Though every thing may sound well recorded I dont think you can pass your vocal off as 'pro' !!
You need to practice your voice, gargle, smile and sing, make funny guttural sounds, any thing just to 'know thy voice' 
Start by speaking a sentence from a book and slowly change to singing it, because your singing voice is the same range as your talking voice, you just have to breath differently and control your voice box differently.
Keeping to your normal vocal range you can then go up or down when the song demands it.

I like your song though, it's a bit Queenie and Beatleish sometimes, cool.
Nice choice of instruments.

Very sweet dude....  It's much better quality than the first one....  I have to agree that the instrumentation is fantastic, but I also have to agree that you need to annunciate a bit more.. But, I really like the way this turned out....  It sounds pretty cool, Definitely keep working on your annunciation and a bit on your sound, because I think you have some serious potential to get some real power...  And this song could use a bit more power...

          JimK

Thanks Jim!

How can I improve on annunciation?

Are there any exercises I can do?