#1April 6th, 2007 · 12:01 AM
97 threads / 43 songs
500 posts
Australia
Smoke
*

This song is not in a battle


Lyrics are here: http://forum.bandamp.com/Lyrics_Review/48756.html

They aren't in the song, but they fit with the synth part if anyone wants to sing to this.

All programmed in FL7

Hope you enjoy it

Cheers

WB

P.S I had another version with guitars instead of piano and a flute (I think) instead of the synth. If you want to hear that one, I can post it if you wish, I just liked the ring of the piano here.

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#2April 6th, 2007 · 12:07 AM
65 threads / 2 songs
1,062 posts
United States of America
Wow! I love the music in this! The sounds are just a bit artificial sounding.  But wow, good writing skills, man!  I love the chorus!  Do you play the piano?  man, i can hear the song with different instruments and it sounds BADA*S!
#3April 6th, 2007 · 12:19 AM
77 threads / 45 songs
2,296 posts
United States of America
this is pretty good WB..nice flow here....nice change at :53& 1:33(close enuff)....good mix  it sounds real even
nice tune
Im sure this is going to sound nice with vocals

Nice work
lil man

Gets a good rating

Flyer
#4April 6th, 2007 · 02:49 AM
127 threads / 43 songs
2,808 posts
Puerto Rico
WB man your getting better by the minute.hope to hear on of your songs and lyrics put together.
This is well done!
#5April 6th, 2007 · 08:31 AM
5 threads / 5 songs
590 posts
United Kingdom
good composition. the sounds and timing are a bit artificial (you can tell its been made on a program) but i do like it. All the sounds go together very well and that is a very catchy piano riff. perhaps take the song idea and record it live on a multitrack program.
 
Ian
#6April 6th, 2007 · 02:05 PM
37 threads / 19 songs
618 posts
United States of America
is it just me or what?
I keep hearing all of my old amiga warez and intro's it seems today..
maybe it's just stuck in my brain or sumptin??


blueyes
#7April 6th, 2007 · 02:28 PM
160 threads / 15 songs
2,311 posts
United Kingdom
re: Smoke
if lyrics there..............why not here????
nice electro............not finished so no vote.......k
bass sound a bit barfy???
real piano?
lol

the fish
#8April 6th, 2007 · 03:55 PM
37 threads / 19 songs
618 posts
United States of America
synth'd
"solient green"..  just my first thought.. good composition though..


Dan - Blue
#9April 6th, 2007 · 04:41 PM
371 threads / 187 songs
3,375 posts
United Kingdom
Nice with Vox
The piano is nice, and I feel it will go nice with some vox, hope you find someone or yourself to do it for you.

Denis
#10April 6th, 2007 · 10:41 PM
97 threads / 43 songs
500 posts
Australia
Ok, fish, just for you...
Here's the lyrics
Smoke
My heart's stone cold,
My lungs are gone,
My liver's failed,
Because my body's a chemical plant,
My teeth are black,
My skin is white,
My throat is rotting,
Chorus: (direct from verse)
The smoke will claim me through the night,
Surely I'll be alright,
But there's little doubt, that I'm over and out,
And I'm gonna lose the fight,
To the smoke,

My heart's on fire,
My one desire,
I can't go on,
Because me body's burning out,
I can't go on,
My spirit's failed,
I'm dead inside,
Chorus

Bridge:
No one's gonna save me from the smoke,
No one's gonna know,
No one's gonna save me when I choke,
From the torn up breath of my own,
No one's gonna save me from the smoke,
No one's gonna know,
No one's gonna save me when I choke,
Save me from the smoke,

My heart's stone cold,
My lungs are gone,
My liver's failed,
Because my body's a chemical plant,
My teeth are black,
My skin is white,
My throat is rotting,
Chorus

Thanks for all the comments, if I could get hold of a microphone, I would record this on acoustic guitar, as that's how it was written, but I do love the piano sample I found in fruity loops. The main idea for the synth sound was for someone on bandamp who wanted to collab their vocals, Flyer's mentioned something, and originally I thought of removing it in the final product, but maybe if I rearrange it a bit, turn the voc. down on it, or shoot it up an octave. I was hoping the sounds weren't too cheesy together and the synth sounding a bit cliche, but if anyone thinks something should change (fish, bass?) it's just a few simple clicks and finding the right sound.

Hey fish, you caught me out with the lyrics, people would check out the lyrics there and hopefully leave comments there 
But it's up here now, so...


Cheers

WB
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