Another try out, this time on the vocals,
I have plenty of comments of my own now, but it came out as it came out, and I'm still happy with it.

I'd love to be able to describe it to you, but maybe the best thing for you to do is to just listen to it.

cool.... like a mix of VNV nation, Dance or Die, and The Young Gods.

sincerely enjoyable!

Nice idea! I like it. And I think that it could be finnished with...bagpipes? I don't know. In my head here would be very interesting with bagpipes:)

Bagpipes?

Bagpipes??????

Ok cool! I like it, or should I say 'I'll think about it'

Did you know - "that some famous person is quoted to have said that the Bagpipes are the one instrument that sound the same before you've learnt how to play them and after you've learnt how to play them"
I heard it on the Weakest Link tonight and now you come up with Bagpipes! 

Thanks very much for the comment as always.

Nice recording Kings...I had a hard time understanding the lyrics when you were singing them  at the begining...then they got more clearer during the song...your doing really good....Ummm  I do stumble over your lyrics though

(Its A little inside joke, people)

Im glad to see when someone as your self joins bandamp with the determination you are showing.....cool

Flyer

For all those 'stumbling' past my door I've posted the lyrics for this song here : http://forum.bandamp.com/Lyrics_Review/38287.html

Seeing as I cant post any more songs, all I can do is give you the words for the songs that I have posted.

nice overall mix, being a drummer, i like interesting drum samples...these are very tasty, simple, but it fits the keyboards and vox

i'd like to hear a huge thumping kick drum when the song really kix in at 1:34

also, i don't think bagpipes are your missing link hahaha.

sounds great, i like to trance out to this stuff

This is really listenable. How 'bout live drums behind this insead of samples, that would be hot. I can't hear the lyrics but i like the vocal anyways.

I would add a sax rather than bagpipes, a tenor sax playing long  bass notes around the melody

well the songs says it.............oh yeahh..........nice song dude keep it up

Doe : I will indeed after such beautiful comment, thanks.
And to every one else who's enjoyed my little experiment.

Since being on this site I've been learning about vocal/musical production, (JBP's tutorials and alike) so I hope to incorporate what I've picked up in the next work I do.

I've just uploaded some vocals which I'd love a reaction too, even some 'bagpipe' and 'sax' suggestions would be most welcome. Check this out

This is a dramatic improvement over The One (in my talentless and ignorant oppinion)

It gets to the beat faster. Though, I don't like how the rhythm is disrupted in the ~.50 second mark. It actually throws me an eye twinge. The intro wasn't so long as to cause me to twitch my eyes. I do like how you have some sort of lyrics going on, too. I don't listen to much techno - but the stuff I hear generally is just a mindless droning rhythm that may shift a bit and change some intrsuments here and there. I like that you're kind of progressing and telling a story with the two songs that I've heard.

While I like this track more than The One, it seems that you're much more bound here. At least, untill the end. Which makes me happy because the lyrics itself say "it is so beautiful to be free" which is emphesizing the change that you're going through. Yeah, it is definately fun to listen to.

Though. I could deal with less fake endings. (screams at last 30 seconds of song)

Cheers Dark, appreciate the comment.

You are comparing apples and pears though, The One is a TOTALLY different song/creation.

The One is ALL samples and started life as a loop which I ironed out.

This is an attempt at creating a song for my lyrics, one of the first attempts too.

I'm a lyric writer and singer, and to bring this into the present I'd much rather you commented on this http://forum.bandamp.com/Audio_Review/3786.html, it's where I am now.

Unless someone comes along and says "Here, have some money to cover your bills for a few months, here's a studio and a band, I love that song, re-record it" then these 'songs' are done and finished as far as I'm concerned.

Onwards to the next Jelly and Mustard creation

I'll get to it sometime tomarrow. Mynet time only includes headphones for two hours each day, unfortionately.

Nice work it has a great sound
Great vocals