Right. I hate to run through and re-replay things, so I fixed something in the second verse when I fucked it up, I made a few little errors elsewhere. Like in the final chorus, but I doubt anyone will notice over my shitty playing.

Edit: Also. I cannot sing, so if you'd rather hear an accoustic version without vocals, give me a buzz and I will crash record one.

No. I actually put effort into the structure this and I refuse to let it go without comments.

it's a bit too free-form, Akuard, to carry itself off well as a song at this point. I suspect you could profit from some focused work on building a distinct song structure, to give the song a sense of direction. Also, it seems that you may lack a bit of confidence in projecting yourself in the song. The playing sounds a bit timid as do the vocals. More assertive delivery may help to drive the music as well.

no I don't wanna hear an acoustic version without you singing. I think you should expose your... talents (or not) to the audience, and indeed ask for feedback. I think you deserve it. You clearly DID put effort in getting this structured nicely, but there are some suggestions I'd like to make.

To start with... Well, I really think you should practice to a metronome atleast, preferrably, a drum machine. You can get a simple one like Hammerhead (free of charge) off the web... No probs, just run it on your cpu and play to it's simple beats... Now, that will tighten your play up big time. Even though you would prefer tempo dynamics, I really think you should train yourself playing to a rigid tempo first. And get a multitrack recording program (Audacity, or Kristal are good and free of charge... google them, download and install) so you can actually mix the drum rhythm and the guitar you play to it, and later dub vocals over them. THERE ... your very first DECENT recording!

Think about it, necessary steps to be taken! I can clearly hear you have quite some plans with your composition skills, now go and start do them justice!

:'( It has a chorus and two verses.

I don't understand? In what sense?

I do practice scales to my metronome. It goes BEEP BEEP BEEP. Do you mean I should practice this song to the metronome? I will post a song that is in perfect 4/4 time if you want.

... I don't like the idea of machine making my music for me. I also don't like the idea of recording the music and words seperately-> it loses authenticity.

Thanks! I am happy that I made a song that was a song and not just me riffing, for a change.

had to say something abut what you said

"don't like the idea of machine making my music for me."
Actually no machine can make music for you, sorry... but you could use your computer as a tool for making (YOUR) music as you use it for writting a poem in Word... the machine won't tell you what to write.

Try playing with a simple beat, as puppet suggested.  One have to learn to put things in the box before trying to take them out... 

Indeed I agree, that's true the machine is just the instrument, not the creative talent "creating" the music! the trick is automation.. you don't like automation? hmmm very well.

Ok get this: if you have some means of banging things live, like a conga or a tambourine or real shakers or whatnot (percussion elements), or even something improvised as a cardboard box, you can use your metronome to help you stay tight as you drum a manually played rhythm into your mic, onto a track of your multitrack recorder. Then you take your guitar and sing and play at the same time, using the drums you just created as a reference, and there you go - all authentic, no automation, here's a tight and more complete song!

just an idea though. just trying to suggest things in a way I guess.

Mm. I will post the song about the guy's girlfriend I stole, I just have to burn it.

There's so much lack of tempo, rhythm and tuning in the vocals.
I dind't understand what your intention was....sorry, don't want to discourage you. Practice a bit please, rehearse.
It just hurt my ears a bit

I can't sing :-(

DARK STUFF MAN - I kept waiting for you to explode into something Ramone or Sid Vicous-like. The whole song is a bit like an intro where one is waiting to drop into a head banging punk song (which is totally OK)
Maybe give it a try....   I get it that your timing is intentionally "free form".  I like that, it's very creative. Not everyone's cup o' tea, but who the f**k cares what everyone thinks anyways.   Keep it up.

ok, you have been un-banned

now, you must understand that what you said was pretty much an attack on every artist on BandAmp, but - here's your chance to clarify what you meant by making a comment like that: http://forum.bandamp.com/The_Pit/38089.html

I'm new here, so this is my first vote, and comment.   I've been browsing and listening to several other members, and love the diversity here, from real pro's to people trying to get the hang of different aspects of music, how cool to have this forum, wow !    any way,   I thought it was a little rough around the edges, but I tend to go for that myself so....