#1January 23rd, 2008 · 12:00 AM
75 threads / 4 songs
531 posts
Cook Islands
Serenading Silence
Serenading Silence(for Jessi to D)
(A little something for my friend Jessi.Kind of random n such)


I've got this mix tape
Full of silence
That takes the shape
Of the awkwardness between us

I know every word
To every song
And the licks are what sing
My dreams to a far off fairyland

It's all just another false pretense
She can be that awesome guitar part
But in all reality
She's just another crappy drummer
[Chorus]

it all sounds the same
but I can feel the love
in every word
every word you didn't say
every word, every word
you don't believe
every word that
I just need to hear


But who the hell am I
To critisize
this beautiful work of art
That no one seems to notice anyways?

Sorry but there's no more words
In my vast repertoire
So I'm going to watch this movie
'Love Is For the Birds'

[chorus]
it all sounds the same
but I can feel the love
in every word
every word you didn't say
every word, every word
you don't believe
every word that
I just need to hear
#2January 23rd, 2008 · 10:52 AM
27 threads / 2 songs
179 posts
Canada
good start! I feel some continuity issues tho.

'You're under this false pretense
That she can be that awesome guitar part'

I think this is refering to the singer's self in 3rd person?

how about: It's all just another false pretense
           She can be that awesome guitar part
           But in all reality
           She's just another crappy drummer

Ok and for the Chorus maybe something along the lines of this:

it all sounds the same
but I can feel the love
in every word
every word you didn't say
every word, every word
you don't believe
every word that
I just need to hear

Just some ideas. I really like the concept of this. Feel free to myob on this if I am off base
thx for posting this
 
-Mark
#3January 24th, 2008 · 10:53 PM
75 threads / 4 songs
531 posts
Cook Islands
dusty you're amazing!!!!
thanks :]
now it sounds way cool!!!
#4January 24th, 2008 · 10:54 PM
75 threads / 4 songs
531 posts
Cook Islands
I've got this mix tape
Full of silence
That takes the shape
Of the awkwardness between us

I know every word
To every song
And the licks are what sing
My dreams to a far off fairyland

It's all just another false pretense
She can be that awesome guitar part
But in all reality
She's just another crappy drummer
[Chorus]

it all sounds the same
but I can feel the love
in every word
every word you didn't say
every word, every word
you don't believe
every word that
I just need to hear


But who the hell am I
To critisize
this beautiful work of art
That no one seems to notice anyways?

Sorry but there's no more words
In my vast repertoire
So I'm going to watch this movie
'Love Is For the Birds'

[chorus]
it all sounds the same
but I can feel the love
in every word
every word you didn't say
every word, every word
you don't believe
every word that
I just need to hear
#5January 25th, 2008 · 12:42 AM
27 threads / 2 songs
179 posts
Canada
Hey, what can i say? 

Nice work MM...keep 'em coming!

-Mark
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