www.myspace.com/eskimobrit

Verse
my sister once told me if she could have anything
it would be a lucky dip and her numbers picked
a 3 bedroomed house on the road that leads up to the stars
and a silver diamond TVR
 
Pre
if i had the key to solve your mystery tell me what would it be?
 
Chorus
could it be an island in the sun, we can have some fun
warm fire when the day is done, with a special someone
pure white sands and ocean view, coz its mine too
what makes paradise for you
 
Verse
A warm summers day your all alone with your mate
play fight throughout the night
your happiness is being with them your cares just seem to fade
like the bubbles in your lemonade
 
Pre
 
Bridge
Some people want the simple thing a little love and joy could mean everything
some people try buy happiness to find their paradise more or less
 
Chorus x2

I really really like this piece of yours, A! only one thread too I see, do you do this kind of thing regularly or was this a one off 'spurt of inspo' ?

There is something really good going on in your writing.
It edges on the obscure yet is plainly understandable.
And each last line is strong and carries the rest on easily!

I really like :
"Some people want the simple thing a little love and joy could mean everything
some people try buy happiness to find their paradise more or less"

If I were to sing this I would change only some grammatical points, the rest I like a lot!

So the big question, do you have music to it, I for one am really intrigued!
Another big question, will you be back to read this?
I really hope your not a "spurt" in the pan!
Because I'd like to read more!

i heard this with a slap happy beat and two vocals...

and the key to solve "your" mystery is a loaded statement...
i like those...

keep 'em comin'....