#1December 17th, 2006 · 08:57 PM
91 threads
73 posts
United States of America
good-bye poem
took a little walk
it was half past dark
decided to head on down the the park
saw that bench where cells were exchanged
went over to where my life was changed

over on the swings
where we'd play that little game
and i was the bride and you were the groom
you'd try to save me from that room
up high in the sky
were we could live on dreams and nothings would appear as the seemed

there's the tree where we wrote our names
back when we were young
in those childish days
the patch of grass where we'd howell at the moon

when the leaves fall off all the trees you and me
we'd be together on our knees
reciting lines from the songs we knew
those were the days when i loved you

there's the spot where we said good-bye
i knew it was over by the look in your eyes
times have changed
and so have you
but i'll always remember those days i spent with you
#2December 18th, 2006 · 02:41 AM
341 threads / 59 songs
4,361 posts
Cymru (Wales)
This starts off really good,
I'm a bit confused as to the age span this covers, it sounds like a teenager remembering some hefty relationship from all the way back when they were 8 or 9 years old!

But then "where cells were exchanged" takes it into a completely different dimension.
Cells as in cell phones? or Cells as in little amoeba type things and saliva?
It sounds a little too scientific for such an otherwise normal recollection.
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