I used to sing this one, so it has some sort of melody, I should record it.

Tell me what you think.......

I met her down by the river
I met her there down by the rock
I met her then in some down town den
Where she said to me
Don’t you
Don't you
Don’t you ever stop

I met her in a memory
That we’d meet upon the hill
We met a little later in a hotel room
Where no one pay attention
And no no-body
No no-body
No no-body paid the bill

We met upon those summer lanes
We would meet there every day
I meet her now and again
She is the
        most beautiful thing
                       I could ever say

We meet around the one-way street
I’m behind the wheel
She’s in the passengers seat
We met, to never forget
That if you start a fire
You can expect
You can expect.... yea
You can expect to feel the heat

Strong story all the way through. Needs a strong rhythm to the vocals.

Okay, now...

The first two lines of the first two stanzas are a little weak.

"I met her down by the river
I met her down by the rock"

Its generic. Make stronger images - "The river was raging, we met at Sharp Rock.

"I met her in a memory
That we'd meet upon a hill.

First line is great! Second line is generic. It needs to be more interesting. If you just change a word or two...

"I met her in a memory
I met her by the still"

"I met her on a memory
We met on Cotton Hill
We met a little later in some motel room
Where no one pay attention
And no no-body
No no-body
No no-body paid the bill"


Third stanza is better. The lyrical hook at the end of each stanza is great. Good job.

I just realized I didn't even know who wrote this until just now. Here you go, Kings. Put that rhythm to the vocals.

Cheers simon.

I didn't meet her at Sharp rock (and it's not anyway, it's big, round and smooth)
And I've never even been to Cotton Hill.

I'm one of those writers who relates the experiences of my life into lyrics and poetry.
And I've been to all these places mentioned.

I actually wanted to generalize in this one, it's my way of making it personal.

Thanks for thinking it out anyway.

I wasn't saying you should use my lyrics - just that I think you went too far into the general for it to be intersting. I still think it's great

Great lyrics here. 

Thank you.
It is a song just not made yet!