#1February 12th, 2009 · 02:56 PM
102 threads / 59 songs
204 posts
Canada
Johnnie and the Devil
Alright so I set out to write a bluegrass sort of Devil and Daniel Webster type tale and did. I haven't quite gotten around the recording it yet but I was hoping to get some feedback on the lyrics and looking to change up a line or to (those in bold) so suggestions are welcome. Anyways the story's pretty basic. Boy meets girl, boy sells soul to the devil in the interest of winning girl's affection, devil makes boy fabulously wealthy, boy becomes shrewd and forgets girl, boy realizes his error too late and runs from devil. So:

Well Johnnie used to come round here
But that was long ago
And now they say he's doomed to run,
forever on his own
Oh forever on his own.

So the story goes he loved a girl
A dame so fair and new
And gave the devil all he's worth
to make that dream come true
Oh and make that dream come true.

 (Chorus)
Well now Johnnie, Johnnie, Johnnie, what you gonna do?
With no one left to help and nothing left to lose.
And the devil's on your track and he won't let you loose.
Oh, what you gonna do?

Well the devil gives and the devil takes
And Johnnie knew full well
But love makes good men make mistakes
That pave that road to Hell
Oh that pave that road to Hell

But her love it ain't the lord's to give
And ain't the devil's too
So the devil gives him something else
to make his end come due
Oh to make his end come due.

Well now Johnnie, Johnnie, Johnnie, what you gonna do?
With no one left to help and nothing left to lose.
And the devil's on your track and he won't let you loose.
Oh, what you gonna do?

So Johnnie gets a fortune
Oh but money it'll run you rag'd
And honest John the businessman
Forgets what he'd wished he had
Oh lost what he wished he had


And soon enough when John recalls
The girl he swore to get
He's old and cold and scared,
picks up and runs from his great debt
Oh runs from his great debt

Well now Johnnie, Johnnie, Johnnie, what you gonna do?
With no one left to help and nothing left to lose.
And the devil's on your track and he won't let you loose.
Oh, what you gonna do?

Well Johnnie used to come round here
But that was long ago
And by now the devil's got him
Oh and he ain't lettin' go
Oh he ain't lettin' go

And late at night when the moon is bright
If you hush and listen close
You can hear ole Johnnie howlin'
as the devil takes him home
Oh as the devil takes him home.

Well now Johnnie, Johnnie, Johnnie, what you gonna do?
Well they say abandon all your hope but you've got none to lose.
And the devil's at the gates to come and let you through.
Oh, what you gonna do?
#2February 12th, 2009 · 10:29 PM
42 posts
United States of America
great song
wow i love it.i really like the theme of the song.it reminds of the ghostrider in a way.
#3February 13th, 2009 · 01:46 PM
341 threads / 59 songs
4,361 posts
Cymru (Wales)
Does this mean something to you?

Well Johnny used to come around here
But that was long ago
They say now that he's doomed to run
Run from the Devils soul
Run from the Devils soul

So Johnnie gets a fortune
Oh but that fortune made him blind
And honest John the businessman
Forgot what he'd left behind
Oh lost what he dreamt he'd find

O! and a missing word maybe? ;

And late at night when the moon is bright
If you hush and listen close
You can (HEAR) ole Johnnie howlin'
as the devil takes him home
Oh as the devil takes him home.

I really like the story and it's so well written , this should make an excellent song.
#4February 13th, 2009 · 06:33 PM
32 threads
158 posts
United States of America
13thFloorProductions wrote…
very nice, it read very nicely, I like it.... it feels to me like the continuation of "The Devil Went Down to Georgia"    very much an enjoyable song

Yeah thats what this song kinda reminded me of lol i was hearing fiddles lol Its a really good song DTF! i really dig it!
#5March 6th, 2009 · 06:51 PM
102 threads / 59 songs
204 posts
Canada
Thanks for the comments and input. If you're wondering what it sounds like check it out...

http://forum.bandamp.com/Audio_Review/7154.html
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