#1January 29th, 2009 · 11:29 PM
24 threads / 15 songs
160 posts
United States of America
Let's Take Time
Let's Take Time... a song that I made... try to see what I was trying to say. I know how it already sounds like.... not the melody but the feel of the song. It will have a minor key feel, punk/pop/rock feel, maybe aggressive. distorted guitars.... definitely
I need CRITIQUES and ofcourse PRAISES!
here:
Take Time This Time

verse1:
Let's not run,
let's take time to breathe
look, we're trying to avoid what can hurt
to filter out, feelings that are made of dirt

prechorus:
the mud is so much and deep
why did we take this leap
it might be too late
so what's the point of playing it safe

chorus:
this time, we're gonna, take it slow
let's make it last, and make us grow
you never know where love might end into
don't force, just let this, emotion flow
immerse your self, and only we'll know
what we can truly evolve into

verse2:
let's never
the touch of skin win
not, ever let this be the base of love
nor, our face be covered of fake gloves

verse3:
Let's look at
what we've got ourselves into
A rigged instrument we have become for
each other, yet so little makes a sound

prechorus:
the mud is so much and deep
why did we take this leap
it might be too late
so what's the point of playing it safe

chorus:
this time, we're gonna, take it slow
let's make it last, and make us grow
you never know where love might end into
don't force, just let this, emotion flow
immerse your self, and only we'll know
what we can truly evolve into

I don't know about verse 3.... i might re-do it. I might redo everything, you never know. I might also add a bridge to this song. Tell me what ampers have to say to this lyrics..
#2January 30th, 2009 · 05:37 PM
340 threads / 59 songs
4,344 posts
United Kingdom
I 've got to first deal with the fact that your comparing this love that youve found with mud, it could of course be a reference to bandAmp, I dont know lol!!
But mud dont do it for me!
I can follow a lot of it, the rest I dont...

A rigged instrument we have become for
each other, yet so little makes a sound

Yet I think it would probably work well as a punk song.
#3January 30th, 2009 · 07:44 PM
24 threads / 15 songs
160 posts
United States of America
haha.... oops, somewhat. Wow, thanks kings, you just made me realize how that word 'mud' can affect the meaning of the song so drastic. lol, all i could of this song is all earth brown wet soil, lol. I might actually change the prechorus now.... hmmm i don't know, i think i'll change some stuff.

     mmmhhh.... i guess you didn't get "A rigged instrument we have become for each other, yet so little makes a sound"?

     punk song... I think most poeple identify punk song as the oldies punk. I try to make it sound like the bands paramore, or fall out boy.
THANKS KINGS,
rap
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