A sad meloncholy number. Revised the previous persiona dn removed some of the distortion and noise.

Lyrics:

And I know that you're there,
But I am afraid to reach out for you,
Cause I know if I do,
You'd just fade away in gloom.
I just feel so unreal,
That I'm constantly running away,
Running away, Running away,
I am just constantly running away.


When the moon stops to shine,
When the sun begins to rise,
In that plae morning light,
I see your face in the skies.
So I greive and sing this song,
Just to tell you I am still here,
Waiting on holding on,
To these bonds of despair.

If I could I'd let me go,
But I'm bounded by my whims.
My crime was I fell in love,
Now I am paying for my sins.

And I don't know myself,
I feel like I am somebody else,
I'm the ghost of a past,
I'd rather be in than present.

Sounds much better , but that 'hall effect' of your vocals has to be improved or re-recorded somehow . Guitars are much better this time .

This is certainly a well written song.  Perhaps more experience with recording would bring it out.  I don't know if I agree with all the effects (both vox and g-tar).  Also, i don't know that I can support that second to last note there, man.

peace

I really like this song...much better recorded this time! The dynamics of your voice are still too much, though. A powerful voice like yours really needs a compressor!

Guitar is still too muffled, and vocal reverb is far too pronounced imho. That keyboard sounds ugly and yah that second to last note is painful.

Still, I think this song is fantastic and very emotional - I've listened to it quite a few times. I would really love to see it with the recording/production job it deserves. Would probably all be solved by a decent microphone/preamp and a few simple plugins.

to be very honest, i dont really know how to rate this song because i cant hear much of it.  the effects are so loud that your voice rings and drowns everything else out. 

sounds like a decent chord progression and the little solos arent bad, but again the effects just ring and makes it very hard to hear.

i agree with jkomdl that the last note is a little harsh, probably not in the right key, but can be easily changed in another recording of this song.

i do really like the lyrics though.  i wish i could hear them in the song though without having to read them to understand.

id say give this song another recording and it could be a good song, just tone down all the effects and show us what you really have in there.  let the instrument and voice talk, not the effects.

lyrics are fine but sound is awful. sorry for this great talent!

Dude it sounds like Kurt Cobain is playing a live acoustic song...or an old Beatles song....Man this is a modern world...change Ur thing...there r so many advanced techniques to record...to edit...and stuff
But lemme tell u that Ur piece and Ur vocals are awesome...excellent in fact...
and it Wu b better if u change the hall effect...and let the vocals come out raw...
Sorry for the bad comments...but its just for your benefit and improvisations...
thanks

Nah, don't be sorry. I know the recording sucks. I am really bad at it. Still I learn new stuff everytime I record a new song, well thats got to be good.

you have a great voice man.

All the same, I'd love to hear this one recorded again (I think I've already said that...)

Karoeke in a church hall, anyone?

Yeh, I'm slow to catch on - apologies for the ignorance of my last post -  I wrote it without listening to the track or reading everything before - I thought it was still the same recording. Anyway so this is a clearer recording, but well theres no point in repeating what everyone says. What hit me first was the vocal effect, then I thought the overall sound was a bit muffled.

It's still a great song though, that much is obvious, definately worth persuing a better recording at some point!

what a swell tune   good produciton values   air quality

I dun really like it. I dont like the hall effect, or the constant high pitches. Don't mean to be rude. Just my personal opinion.

Thanks for all your inputs critical or otherwise. This was the first song I ever recorded. I have a tendency of pressing on the reverb too much. I know the recording quality sucks but my equipment is horrible. I have a mike which cost me 50 Rs. i.e. about 1$. So you know. And yes I knwo the constant coming and going high pitches are a pain to the ears, but I am sure if recorded well they will sound good. But seriously you people have a lot of patience if you can up with crap like this, thanks.