I named this song because of the female vocals i put in the refrain.  I know it don't really fit but that's why I like it.  I hope you all enjoy lestioning to it all most as mich as I enjoyed making it.  please comment.

Intro too long
The female vox are nice, but too low in the mix,
The drums go on too long after the inital vox. try 2 bars

It 's got potential, I would definately remix, add some synth to break it up

Keep working on it

The intro is way too long, I'd cut it at least in half. The vocals are pretty good but they're a bit flat and I agree with Denis, the definitely need to be louder, or at least the piano needs to be quieter. I think you've got a good work in progress but right now it doesn't really feel like a whole song but rather one song (your refrain) repeating between segments of white noise. In terms of improvement, I consider reworking this either into a song with two parts or something more electronic with the refrain being sampled. I'd also consider cutting down the lyric for your refrain, it sounds like a mouthful and I think it would be more effective (and easier to sing) with less words.