Here's a song that I started writing a month ago. I'm done for the most part of the lyrics, but I'm really thinking of changing the chorus in the end a bit, so it won't sound too repetitive. And with the melody, I don't, I might have to change some some too, just a little bit. If you hear anything in the background. because that's my brother in my room playing his music. So please don't mind that. The quality is not that great, but w.e Listen to everything, specially the lyric formation and my vocals. I want those parts to really improve. Don't be afraid to too critical... Everybody has thoughts, so I wanna hear your thoughts. If it is simply "nah ain't my type" or "yep it's good", that's fine with me. Don't afraid to be blunt either.
Thanks,
Rap

Here the lyrics...
What is left?

What is here, what is there?
What is left, and what has not?
what is right, and where is right?

how much we know, we just don't know
when we ask these things, the rain keeps falling down
the landfill rise, suphocate the sky

there's no end, are we only here to watch?
this sight of empitness walking with us
looking for something, that is more than
nothing

more than nothing
oh... we want more, yea

why do we look? and where should we look?
what else is here? are we satisfied?
grabbing so hard, only finding

the broken light is shining bright,
it's so dark, its exhausting to our eyes
if it was shattered, is a view of  a thou-

sand lives... full of lies
we want more than we
could ever have
we want more, we want more,
we want more!

What is here, what is there?
What is left, and what has not?
what is right, and where is right?
Is this what life has to offer?

Rap...if you work on this more you could have a real decent tune going..of course you know about the quality of the recording..I like the chord/music flow....seems like your holding back at times on your vocals....
I would continue to work on this...add...some bass/ maybe some piano/keys...some harmoies...and try to get a better recording of what you have so far

the rain keeps falling down
the landfill rise, suphocate the sky

I really like that line in your lyrics....

Flyer

Nice rating

Wellcome to the AMP!!!!
Great song ......................

So how can we help ...........
First off switch off the TV when u record ................haha......
but serious.................
download free recording software AUDACITY so you can record voice and guitar seperate and then balance voice against guitar
its here:

http://audacity.sourceforge.net/

hope that gets u going

swordfish

Do you want insult my ears? Sorry, I cant stand this shit....
You cant hold your voice on the pitchlevel. TV is annoying extremely

To say it in other words: You cannot sing, don't give up your job. Every wardrobe sings better than you, my musical friend. The lyrics arent bad though

Steady on TK, is this really from you??

I don't think this type of critque is going to help this AMPER. It's not constructive at all??

The TV may be purposely put there??Although through the recording quality we cant figure out what it is saying.

Back to the song:

The overall structure, progression, and melody are in place.

How are you recording at the moment, what equipemt do you have?

Did you try those youtube online vox lessons, they are really good to help you improve.

It would be great if learn how to multi-track.

Don't be afraid to ask for help.

Denis