#1December 5th, 2008 · 11:53 PM
151 threads / 150 songs
265 posts
United States of America
In Control of This
*

This song is not in a battle


A song about hubris and failure. I put considerable thought into this one, but I do not like the vocals.

Going back to hell on a two engine plane
Somehow I will never be the same
I know what going back means
It makes me want to scream
But I can't
Because I am in control
I am in control
It's cool, it's cool, it's cool
I swear to God, I'm in control!

I can't hear you
I am in control of this
I can win this
I think that I can fix this
I'm not listening
I am in control of this

Everbody's offering me advice
But I pick them off like so much lice
I have this feeling inside
That the end is so near
But it's not that clear
Because I am in control
I am in control
It's cool, it's cool, it's cool
I swear to God, I'm in control!

Everybody's steering me away
But I can see it coming, clear as day
There might be an iceburg ahead
There lies my death-bed
I won't end up dead
Because I am in control
I am in control
It's cool, it's cool, it's cool
I swear to God, I'm in control!

Does this song not follow the Rules? Please Report Abuse
#2December 6th, 2008 · 06:12 AM
54 threads / 29 songs
1,552 posts
United Kingdom
Another song that I like, but which is missing some dynamics and suffers from (for me) a melody line that lacks any real impact.
I'd be really tempted to brighten the mid range eq on the instrumental backing (all of it), and speed it up by about 8 bpm.
Your voice is good... really, I think it has a great sound to it - but it doesn't help the song along, and I don't think it matches the sentiment of the (also good) lyrics.
I want this song to work, and I think it can.  It just needs a bit of care and attention.
I know you can do this - you are a skilful musician who writes some very catchy music, and the recording quality and playing are equally competent - so keep it up, and push yourself to create a piece that keeps the listener interested throughout.
#3December 6th, 2008 · 06:31 AM
187 threads / 27 songs
2,802 posts
Germany
Jiminuk said it all. I second that.
this music is pro made
but you MUST sing one octave higher!!!!
the vocals drown in the mud of music around 500Hz... no clearance
I stumbled at 1:48 you were out of sync there.. same at 3:34
A wrong note at 2:30 by the guitar

Song is great
Composition is great
Lyrics and words are great
Your voice is great

All I can say is that I would love to hear this song sung by a girl

I am sure you'll redo it and inspire the clouds of people
#4December 6th, 2008 · 09:46 AM
90 threads / 73 songs
263 posts
United Kingdom
I like it, but I agree higher vocals would be better as they are a little hard to hear. But as I get further through the song they sound alright actually. I don't think your vocal range would let you go another octave higher would it? Hmm.

I like the chorus. Works really well. I might have to go and listen to some more of your stuff now 
Sorry, you do not have access to post...
Wanna post? Join Today!

Server Time: September 17th, 2019 · 8:31 PM
© 2002-2012 BandAMP. All Rights Reserved.