#1August 15th, 2007 · 01:44 PM
10 threads / 10 songs
30 posts
United States of America
Carnival
*
Please vote for this song !
Current votes: 12 (needs min. 15)
It’s in the battle 2007-09


just a 3/4 tune that was stuck in my head, so i played it for clay and he described a series of images the tune invoked which we then turned into the lyrics of this song.
your comments are always greatly appreciated and your criticism doubly so
love and light
zak

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#2August 15th, 2007 · 02:13 PM
371 threads / 187 songs
3,394 posts
United Kingdom
Lovely vocal melody and vox.

Could see this performed in a theartre

I started singing the scales in the backgound of the melody, perhaps a piano or something would be nice..

Nice work.

Will rate


Denis
#3August 15th, 2007 · 05:43 PM
5 threads / 5 songs
590 posts
United Kingdom
woah, impressed. lovley voices, and imaginative lyrics. recording quility and mixings spot on.
 not alot to criticise im afraid. i can only suggest you could add abit of piano in an instrumental, poss a cello, but it would have to be real. maybe some bongos aswell, but u dont want to lose the already present atmosphere under too many layers of instruments.

Ian
#4August 17th, 2007 · 04:31 AM
17 threads / 3 songs
185 posts
United States of America
I love this
the singer has a very unique and great sounding voice.  the harmonies are  a nice touch... I love the guitar in this  ..seems like everyone wants to keep doing their acguitar parts till there is no string rattle or sounds that make it "real" this has the live "live real sound" to it.. excellent song . The lyrics are very cool too.  get high vote
#5August 17th, 2007 · 05:36 AM
9 threads / 8 songs
34 posts
South Africa
Excellent.

Sounds a bit like Muse.  I'd love to hear this with a bass guitar, some light drumming and perhaps some interesting industrial effects :-)  Actually, do you mind if I remix this?
#6August 17th, 2007 · 10:57 AM
10 threads / 10 songs
30 posts
United States of America
First off, Thanks for the kind words everyone.
DK, Ive got no problem with a remix.
Excited to hear it.

Cheers
Clay
#7August 17th, 2007 · 11:45 AM
29 threads / 14 songs
355 posts
Poland
Hello Waterstop. I have to say I am impressed. I also could hear this one in a theatre. The harmonies remind me a bit of Maroon5 (or whatever the name  of the band is), but that's a complement. I would love to see you live - I guess you must perform beautifully. I will rate this song somewhere at 85-90 because I think that a full  instrumentation (although it may not be what you have set out to do as a duet) would turn this tune into a gem.
Anyway,
loved the track - both the guitar playing and the quality of the recording. And the vox, of course.
What setup r u using for recording stuff? Is it a home studio?

Jim
#8August 17th, 2007 · 01:16 PM
189 threads / 27 songs
2,834 posts
Germany
I find this quality amazing
what a great vocal work. professional and origin
#9August 17th, 2007 · 08:08 PM
341 threads / 59 songs
4,361 posts
Cymru (Wales)
Very nice song performed very well. You have one beautiful voice and you use it well.
Could you not have got your harmonial matey to sing a 'complimenting' song or to kick off on a different aspect of your main vocal and lyric? He/She sounds a bit 'whinie' later on in the song. 
This gets a high vote and is off to my Favs, cheers. 
#10August 19th, 2007 · 02:30 PM
128 threads / 44 songs
2,814 posts
Puerto Rico
Your singing style reminds me of Fred Mercury at times not the voice just the style.Amazing work!
love the time signature!!
Very original music and that voice man what talent!!!
Nothing can I say about improving this track except to maybe ad an acoustic solo break to bring out the tempo signature and accentuate the 3's.Just matter of taste and opinion.

Awesome track!


Marino
#11August 29th, 2007 · 06:45 PM
49 threads / 42 songs
493 posts
United Kingdom
Great performance. Just two points for constructive criticism:

The vocals to me lack a bit of clarity. I would strongly recommend BBE Sonic Maximiser just to give them that little cut-through.

The guitar has alot of strumming noise. Suggest changing your mic positioning when you record.
#12September 20th, 2007 · 07:50 AM
113 threads / 58 songs
464 posts
Nepal
what a good song!
I'm not keen on comparison but Ruffus Wainwrite pop in my mind as I listen to the track
Being in the battle myself I feel very humble when I listen to your song
I vote and very high
#13September 20th, 2007 · 08:28 AM
92 threads / 12 songs
906 posts
United States of America
Overall, a very polished sound (to these ears). Interesting song structure and lyric content. Vocals are quite nice (lead vocal reminds me of Adam Levine of "Maroon 5"... but that has already been mentioned). With a bit more tweaking (with the possible inclusion of a simple tasteful acoustic guitar lead in that mid-song break as well as some other teaks as already mentioned) this song could enter the professional ranks
#14December 22nd, 2007 · 06:54 AM
1 threads / 1 songs
10 posts
Sweden
In my humble opinion....
You love to sing
Right tone and attitude

I'll do something more with the song... maybe some percussions... or bass...

btw: #love & light#... nice
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