This is the scratch of Marino's  Collab .... I thought I would post this to see if anybody even like the idea of what I was doing and to get some suggestions. I like the verses but I'm now hearing the chorus go a different way.

Lyrics:
Verse:
Burnt torn, bleeding skin broken shattered bones
millions of people dead now no one has a home

Prechorus:
how could we do this to ourselves
why would we even try

Chorus:
now we all die  
bombs from the sky
no time to cry
where is the Divine

Verse2:
and as far as I can see
every things been blown to hell
 was no warning signs
not sirens or warning bells

how could we do this to ourselves
why would we even try

now we all die  
bombs from the sky
no time to cry
where is the Divine

Verse3:
All our hair is gone
radiation burns our skin
food and water's gone
we sit and pray for the end

chorus outro

I knew you were an awesome guitarrist but singer too.I'm impressed. I totally dig the direction your heading.I emailed you some info.Great job and thanks again for taking the time

I love the tone to your voice in this...   Very nice.....Lyrics fit well.....   Vocal fits well.....

          Yeah.....   I like it!

                    JimK

Absolutely!
Chant Rock! or whet ever, Toasty your a high priest
You've such power, love it.
I didn't see it in the lyrics, or maybe saw too much, but as you've made this piece I can appreciate them, the greatness of the whole track is also found in the words. Good job old chap! Well sung!

Thanks glad you like it so far. I still have more work to be done on it.

this is good! I can tell this took a lot of work and sounds like it was well worth it. 

A little too heavy for my personal tastes, but I can get into it. Mood, vocals, the echo, exploding chorus. Cool music marino, wicked singing toasted, really out there, sounds strained (in a good way though).

Cheers

WB

Start off like all great classic metal pieces… with some darker melodies. 0-28


Scratch into some happier chords, 28-35 (Out of place)
….


The bass drops down into the lyrics and the drums alone. The guitar and the drums gain intensity about 1:00 in, and the voice remains the same…


The intensity takes a HUGE leap about 1:10 in… the voice raises a bit but for the most part remains the same… (assuming this is the chorus)


1:30 or so, we’re back to the laidback light chordal. (Out of place, a little, try it an octave down)

The chorus, again, the vocals are off as they’re not intense enough. You sound great in all of the laid back parts. It seems like you cannot get your voice to match the guitar for intensity. You can hold notes and sing really well. This could be easily fixed by dropping the level of distortion.

(Guitar+Drums here is EXTREMELY choice, love the fucking scream… but again it seems way out of place.)

You definitely have that haunting voice (Doors, Danzig).


All and all great song!