#1May 16th, 2006 · 04:33 PM
21 threads / 21 songs
72 posts

This song is not in a battle

I recorded this Song altogether in two days, I was very concentrated on this one... Maybe it's because of it's background.
I think it's my best song so far. So please let me know what you think.... Most of it is instrumental. It's inspired by some really cool disco nights I had in the past few weeks...
and by a girl... it's not that I have a chance but it's something and hey isn't that anything.

It's a blend of different music influences....  I call it a EBM-Rock-Ballad 


I inhumed my former ire
Garden Eden is closed that's for sure
The funeral occurred on fertile sand
Forget my nots will seam this land again
your existence is my cure
you have the power I desire
Lying in a blooming meadow
Adore - your - inherent - beauty - glow

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#2May 16th, 2006 · 05:08 PM
160 threads / 88 songs
1,666 posts
United States of America
this is really cool....

  you can feel the emotion in it, and the amount of work shows through...

       The Vocals are a bit loud... but otherwise isn't too bad...

                         really decent...

                               Jim K
#3May 16th, 2006 · 05:15 PM
66 threads / 55 songs
697 posts
United States of America
started to get a bit repetitive... but then those guitars came in.. and saved it.

very emotional sounding..

ahh, chorused vocals.. good.

timing is off in a few spots... but ehhh, gets the message across.

only other criticism would be the effects on the guitars. in my opinion, it's almost too much. ie, almost takes away from the soft, emotional feel of the song...

loving the synths though... very nice.

good work.
#4May 17th, 2006 · 07:33 AM
49 threads / 43 songs
130 posts

Some really nice sounds you found there.

Some comments about your song:

The timing between the LFO controlling the synth sound panned to the left and the bass synth sound in the middle is not optimum yet, you might want to change that.

I think it would be cool if you could create more depth in the synth intro.
Really liking the transition to the guitar part, although the right synth sounds fade out time could be some longer (it's a bit too abrupt now).

the synth sounds during the vocal part are a bit too loud in my opinion. I think it would be nice if it blends more with the guitar (to the background) and then slowly comes to the front when you're not singing.

You can do this with automation (reverb and fader automation). 

the overall song sounds a bit wuzzy (hope you understand that word :P) but I kinda like it in this context, it fits with the vocals.
#5May 17th, 2006 · 11:25 AM
4 threads / 1 songs
16 posts
Because the vibrato in the synthesizer is at a different frequency than the rhythm of the song, it made me dizzy.  I don't think you would get FDA approval.
#6May 17th, 2006 · 02:31 PM
54 threads / 29 songs
1,552 posts
United Kingdom
Ooh, wacky synth sounds coming from the right speaker - it's pretty nice, although goes on a little too long.
The introduction of the guitar saves it, as Takaminerbb says, though.  Then it's a nice sound - I like the guitar effects.

Not so sure at first about the vocals, but the more I listen the more I think it's just because they're too far forward in the mix and, therefore, take away from the instrumental sounds.  Plenty of emotion in the voice, which I like.

By about 3:45 is I really want there to be drums in this - they could add greatly to the build up.  This is a damn long song, but I stayed listening to the end so it must have something

Overall, I think this is a nicely constructed song - pretty well recorded and played.

#7May 20th, 2006 · 08:06 PM
160 threads / 33 songs
1,964 posts
United States of America
Seems a little repetitive to me. Just didn't grab me but then it's not really my type of music. Seems like you could do alot more with this.
#8May 23rd, 2006 · 02:13 PM
118 threads / 55 songs
3,086 posts
man your style becomes increasingly better and better. I love those synths... and the way they flow into the guitar part...

and yes too bad the vocals are a bit loud (but the effects to them are pretty cool), and some of the effects come with some extremely sharp frequencies, which make my ears bleed... but the song is great, and in my mp3 library..
#9May 23rd, 2006 · 02:36 PM
188 threads / 27 songs
2,825 posts
Best parts 1:30 to 2:26, 3:31 to end
Thats only MY opinion
Good work though
#10June 3rd, 2006 · 08:42 PM
2 threads / 2 songs
27 posts
United States of America
Im definately not a big fan of or vocal effects.  I think you could add or change some stuff and make it better without changing it overall feel
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