| Ancient Times |    |
My first song after staying 6 weeks in south Africa. I developed it there but I wonder why fits so well when I see the snow falling because I played it the first time when it had 35° .
The first time I used my old piano and the first time I tried a new recording technique. I recorded everything, piano, guitar, with my shure pg 48 but maybe I need another one for instrumentals...
Maybe you could listen to it and tell me what you think.
Thanks
How long has it been since your face changed through the mirror?
How many years have passed since you can’t look at yourself anymore?
When have your eyes turned blind for what you had become?
It’s the purest form of tragedy
It’s a story told by a fool
With every Step and star you take
Your blue sky fades to black
And with every single word you say
The numbness of your heart increases
It’s the same old song since yesterday
It’s the same old road that leads to nowhere
It’s the same old thought that may destroy you again
So move on cause you’ll find somebody new
So move on cause you’ll find somebody new
…
The first time I used my old piano and the first time I tried a new recording technique. I recorded everything, piano, guitar, with my shure pg 48 but maybe I need another one for instrumentals...
Maybe you could listen to it and tell me what you think.
Thanks
How long has it been since your face changed through the mirror?
How many years have passed since you can’t look at yourself anymore?
When have your eyes turned blind for what you had become?
It’s the purest form of tragedy
It’s a story told by a fool
With every Step and star you take
Your blue sky fades to black
And with every single word you say
The numbness of your heart increases
It’s the same old song since yesterday
It’s the same old road that leads to nowhere
It’s the same old thought that may destroy you again
So move on cause you’ll find somebody new
So move on cause you’ll find somebody new
…
The composition is very good.
Maybe you need a little more work on the vocals but it's fine.
In my opinion the whole song sounds a bit too "flat". Maybe it's because of the transducer you used or you could correct this by a more accurate equalization and finalization.
However good job.
Maybe you need a little more work on the vocals but it's fine.
In my opinion the whole song sounds a bit too "flat". Maybe it's because of the transducer you used or you could correct this by a more accurate equalization and finalization.
However good job.
Nice Radiohead feel to this song.
The vocals are, for the most part, good but with a few shaky moments here and there. I really like the opening melody but I feel it is a little repetetive as it goes on.
The introduction of the piano in itself is very nice. I can hear what you were trying to do but I feel this part of the song needs tidying up. The piano needs to be a little quieter for one thing. As soon as it is introduced it dominates the sound and things get confused since there appears to be a timing issue between the strummed guitar and the piano. My ear follows the piano which is rigid in structure but I'm also hearing the strumming in the background which is looser in tempo (which fit the earlier part of the song nicely but doesn't sit well with the piano IMO). Don't get me wrong; I love the piano and think that it will work well but it needs to be worked into the flow of the song more coherently.
I like the song in essence and that is why I feel it is deserving of helpful critique.
The vocals are, for the most part, good but with a few shaky moments here and there. I really like the opening melody but I feel it is a little repetetive as it goes on.
The introduction of the piano in itself is very nice. I can hear what you were trying to do but I feel this part of the song needs tidying up. The piano needs to be a little quieter for one thing. As soon as it is introduced it dominates the sound and things get confused since there appears to be a timing issue between the strummed guitar and the piano. My ear follows the piano which is rigid in structure but I'm also hearing the strumming in the background which is looser in tempo (which fit the earlier part of the song nicely but doesn't sit well with the piano IMO). Don't get me wrong; I love the piano and think that it will work well but it needs to be worked into the flow of the song more coherently.
I like the song in essence and that is why I feel it is deserving of helpful critique.
Pretty emotional, and soft. I like it, cause it reminds me of Radiohead or Muse if they took a hit of Ritalin. You were kinda flat in some of the vocal parts, but then again, it enhances the emotionability (if that's a word). Overall, I'm impressed, and I encourage you to keep going.
ktartandude wrote…
Nice Radiohead feel to this song.
The vocals are, for the most part, good but with a few shaky moments here and there. I really like the opening melody but I feel it is a little repetetive as it goes on.
The introduction of the piano in itself is very nice. I can hear what you were trying to do but I feel this part of the song needs tidying up. The piano needs to be a little quieter for one thing. As soon as it is introduced it dominates the sound and things get confused since there appears to be a timing issue between the strummed guitar and the piano. My ear follows the piano which is rigid in structure but I'm also hearing the strumming in the background which is looser in tempo (which fit the earlier part of the song nicely but doesn't sit well with the piano IMO). Don't get me wrong; I love the piano and think that it will work well but it needs to be worked into the flow of the song more coherently.
I like the song in essence and that is why I feel it is deserving of helpful critique.
Yes you're right and thank you alot for your feedback. I had problems to time the piano because I played the guitar before I got the idea of recording a piano part. Maybe I should change the rhythm of the guitar... For itself it stands well I think. I played it because I wanted it to be the leading instrument but then I changed my mind and the thing with the piano happened. I hope I can work it over but it is always hard to go back to recording again...
your style always has this utter dreariness over it... this melancholia which is... getting right to the heart..
at 2.20 interesting change of arrangements... I feel like sitting in a bar and sinking away into one pint after the other...
the piano adds to this... for sure...
your vocals are getting much much better... great sensitivity there........
well a minimal bass line wouldn't hurt though... I know u have a synth which would probably fit it very well for that purpose... maybe played in a rhythmic way to compensate for the lack of drums? if any percussion, only minimal hand percussion would suffice IMO...
anyway.. got my vote... it's beautiful...
at 2.20 interesting change of arrangements... I feel like sitting in a bar and sinking away into one pint after the other...
the piano adds to this... for sure...
your vocals are getting much much better... great sensitivity there........
well a minimal bass line wouldn't hurt though... I know u have a synth which would probably fit it very well for that purpose... maybe played in a rhythmic way to compensate for the lack of drums? if any percussion, only minimal hand percussion would suffice IMO...
anyway.. got my vote... it's beautiful...
Like indeed your Radio-head/esk song.
Your vocals are sometimes a little"not at tone",..try to work on that.
Keep on working you have got talent dude
Your vocals are sometimes a little"not at tone",..try to work on that.
Keep on working you have got talent dude
Agree on eveybody's opinion about vocal quality.
Ancient Times.....Ancient nuances
Ancient Wong Loves Ancient Stories.
Good Concept.
Votes from me no problem!
Ancient Times.....Ancient nuances
Ancient Wong Loves Ancient Stories.
Good Concept.
Votes from me no problem!
I like the lyrics very much. This ancient piano in the end is great, but it's not rhytmic, the guitar and the piano are.. like wild creatures-everyone is doing something different. The song i sreally good, but there is more work on it.
Sorry, you do not have access to post...
Wanna post? Join Today!